


Sanctuary

by OneWhoSitsWithTurtles



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Academy Era, Academy!years, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - School, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ass to Mouth, Bathroom Sex, Blow Jobs, Bullying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Familial Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, Friends to Lovers, Glory Hole, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Mutual Pining, Physical Abuse, Public Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Strangers to Lovers, from Brendol and the bullies, hints of suicidal thoughts, unprotected sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-04-13
Packaged: 2018-10-09 21:24:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10422060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneWhoSitsWithTurtles/pseuds/OneWhoSitsWithTurtles
Summary: Hux's life at the Academy is hell. Between the bullies hunting him for sport and his father considering him a disgusting disgrace, Hux doesn't know if he can survive his final year. Even if he graduates, Hux doesn't know if he'll ever escape his father's influence and scorn.Hux's only sanctuary becomes a forgotten refresher on campus where he meets Kylo Ren. What starts out as sex for money soon develops into far more than Hux ever expected - and everything he is willing to fight for.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **Warnings:** homophobic language is used by Brendol and the bullies. There are hints of suicidal thoughts but no action is ever taken and there is  no major character death. Also, condoms are not used in this story.
> 
>  **Inspiration:** with permission from the artist I have embedded the artwork that inspired the plot bunny for this story before it quickly grew out of hand. Thank you very much to [talonsnudepics](http://talonsnudepics.tumblr.com/post/152567549620/happy-halloween-everyone-sorry-i-didnt-finish) for creating and sharing such amazing artwork, and allowing me to include it here <3

Hux ran down the hallway, aware of the sound of multiple feet pursuing him. He was in a part of the Academy he barely knew; a place with unused lecture halls and storage rooms filled with dusty, broken equipment. Near the end of the hall Hux noticed a door with a sign on it for the men’s refresher and he dashed inside. Hux found an abandoned mop on the floor and slid it through the door handle just in time to keep the door closed when a body slammed forcefully against it.

 

A shoulder pushed against the door again but the mop handle held. Two more sets of feet caught up to the first and Hux heard muttered voices through the door.

 

“The kriffing faggot barred the door somehow,” one guy grumbled; Jacob, Hux thought. The door handle shook but held firm.

 

“Class is starting soon,” a more timid voice pointed out; Anthony.

 

“Forget him,” the third guy decided; Todd. “We gave him a good enough beating for now. Let him think he’s safe and we’ll teach him another lesson later.”

 

There was more grumbling but then Hux heard three sets of feet walking away down the hall, laughter echoing off the walls. Hux wanted to punch something but he didn’t need any more damage to his own body. Instead he grabbed some paper towels from the dispenser and ran them under the tap, wiping away as much blood as he could from his nose and split lip. Hux saw that some of the blood had already dripped onto the collar of his white uniform shirt and there was nothing he could do about the inevitable stain.

 

“Kriff,” he sighed as he threw away the bloodied towels and grabbed more to hold against his face until the blood flow stopped.

 

Hux felt the tremble in his knees as adrenaline drained out of him and Hux stumbled into the middle of three refresher stalls. He locked the door and sat on the toilet seat lid, momentarily beyond the worry of hygiene. _Only one more year_ , he reminded himself. One more year and he would graduate and be free to leave this hellhole. Hux would rather be on the battlefield operating his sniper rifle and getting shot at than deal with this.

 

“Are you going to hurry up and pay me or just sit there?” an unknown voice asked him from the refresher stall between Hux’s stall and the wall. Hux, who had been under the assumption that he was in the refresher alone, let out a string of curses. The unknown voice continued. “I overheard those guys chasing you and if you insist on hiding in here, fine. But at least unbar the door and move to the third stall in case I have real business show up.”

 

Hux listened to the deep, male voice, and frowned. “Who are you?”

 

The voice sighed. “Do you really not know which refresher you locked yourself in?”

 

“Clearly I don’t,” Hux snapped. He wasn’t exactly in a polite mood, with the coppery taste of his own blood in his mouth and his left eye throbbing as it started to bruise and swell closed. “So either explain, or leave me alone.”

 

“I’ll forgive your snarky attitude this time because clearly you’ve had a shit day,” the guy in the other stall said. “And I’ll tell you only if you promise not to report me.”

 

Hux rolled his eyes. “Fine.”

 

“It’s not that simple,” Hux was told. “You see that hole on your left beside the toilet paper dispenser?”

 

Hux looked over and not only saw a relatively small circular hole in the stall wall, but also the pinkie finger of a larger hand sticking through. Already Hux was beginning to get a notion of what sort of ‘business’ went on here, and he wasn’t sure what to make of the stranger in the stall next to him. “A pinkie promise? Really?”

 

“Yes, really. Either promise or get out.” The pinkie finger wiggled at him.

 

Maybe it was the blood loss or the fact that after such a bad day, this was amusing enough to entice him. Either way, Hux threw his soiled paper towel in the small garbage beside the toilet and then reached forward to hook his pinkie finger around the other guy’s. That finger curled around his own and then Hux felt a spark of electricity in his finger and up his arm. He hissed and yanked his hand away. “What the kriff was that?”

 

“A promise bound by the Force. Break the promise and you’ll lose your arm, starting with a slow decay of your finger.”

 

Hux studied his finger, which looked completely normal and unharmed. “You’re a Force wielder?” he asked with disbelief. As far as he knew, any student who had shown aptitude with the Force promptly disappeared; whether for specialized training or eradication, Hux didn’t know.

 

“Let’s keep that between us. My name is Kylo Ren,” the guy explained. “You may have heard of me.”

 

Hux _had_ heard of him. In fact his father had been in a snit about it when he discovered the son of Leia Organa and Han Solo was being sent to the Academy. Hux remembered his father, the Commandant, complaining about this boy who thought he could get away with anything, including the demand to be addressed by a different name, just because his mother was politically powerful. “I thought your name was Ben Solo.”

 

“I’m an unwanted brat,” Ren stated firmly. “You can understand why I wouldn’t want to keep the name.”

 

Hux nodded to himself. No one at the Academy was aware that Hux himself was unwanted and a bastard; everyone thought he was the Commandant’s proud heir. But Hux was always reminded behind closed doors that he had been a mistake, and the only reason he was given the opportunities he got was because Brendol’s true heir had died young. “ _You’re all I’ve got left_ ,” Brendol told Hux. “ _So don’t make me regret keeping you_.”

 

“I understand,” Hux said quietly.

 

Ren was quiet for a moment as well, perhaps surprised by the melancholy tone of Hux’s voice. Then he continued on. “Anyway, I hang out here most of the time because classes are boring. They can't expel me unless I fail my classes, which I don't. The right sorts of people know they can come here to pay me 50 credits and have a good time.”

 

“And what do 50 credits buy?” Hux asked despite himself.

 

“Are you a virgin or just stupid?” Ren countered.

 

Hux glared at the wall. “Neither.”

 

“What else besides fingers do you think would fit through that hole in the wall?”

 

Hux glanced at it and then away, blushing. “50 credits for a blow job? Seems a bit pricey.”

 

“Yeah well,” Hux heard a rustle of fabric like Ren had shrugged his shoulders. “Most of the students here are filthy rich anyway and I’m saving up to buy a ship and say goodbye to this place forever. Plus, it’s the best head you’ll ever get.”

 

The whole situation was so ludicrous that Hux couldn’t stop a small chuckle. “Big statement.”

 

“50 credits and I’ll prove it,” Ren shot back, though Hux thought he could hear a hint of amusement in Ren’s voice too. “What’s your name, by the way?”

 

Hux hesitated, knowing this conversation would likely end _very_ quickly when Ren realized he was talking to the Commandant’s son. Maybe that would be a good thing though, since Hux was actually considering Ren’s proposition. “Does that Force promise go both ways?” he wondered instead of offering his name.

 

“It can, why? I don’t suck and tell if that’s what you’re worried about,” Ren said.

 

“Promise?” Hux insisted. He already got harassed enough by the school bullies who guessed (correctly) that girls didn’t interest him. Hux didn’t need more kindling for the fire.

 

“Yeah man, I promise,” Ren sounded sincere, teasing banter set aside in favour of reassurance.

 

“My name is Armitage Hux.”

 

There was a sudden inhale of air and then a low whistle. “Well I can see why you wouldn’t want me blabbing then.”

 

Ren said nothing else and Hux clenched his fingers into fists. “Do you want me to leave?”

 

“No, you can stay,” Ren offered. “You’re kind of eating into my profit margins locking out other potential customers but,” Hux heard the sound of another shrug, “it seems like you need this right now. And you’re not bad to talk to.”

 

“Thanks,” Hux shook his head and laughed again. Ren laughed with him and it felt good, comfortable. But then Hux started to worry. “I mean, I could pay you to save your profits…”

 

Ren scoffed, still sounding good-natured when he spoke, “Stop making yourself sound like a charity case. You are not paying me to talk to you. If you _do_ pay me, you’re getting a blow job.”

 

Though the memory was hazy, Hux did remember what Ren looked like from the student file his father had been looking through. Long, dark, wavy hair, deep brown eyes, large full lips… The thought of those lips was enough to cause a stirring of heat in his groin. Hux wasn’t a virgin but his experiences had been nothing more than fumblings with another boy at a summer camp he was sent to two years ago when he was sixteen. He didn’t dare pursue anyone at the Academy with all eyes already on him, and it had been a long time.

 

“Um…”

 

“There’s no sense being shy about it,” Ren pointed out. “We all have our urges and I like the money. So all I need is a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’: do you want me to give you a blow job?”

 

Just talking about it, despite making Hux flush with embarrassment, was turning him on more. “Yes.”

 

“Excellent,” there was a smirk in Ren’s voice. “Just pass me the credits and unzip.”

 

It all sounded so business-like and Hux was already too late for his next class to rectify the situation even if he left right now. So he pulled the credits from his pants pocket and held them at the hole in the wall for Ren to pluck up with his fingers. After that Hux forced himself to stand and unzip as instructed, pulling his pants and underwear down below his balls to get the fabric out of the way. Despite being aroused at the thought of all this, Hux was still barely half hard. He gave himself a few strokes to his length, feeling self-conscious.

 

“Anytime,” Ren quipped.

 

“I’m not… ready yet,” Hux winced at how awkward and uncertain he sounded.

 

“For 50 credits you get the full service so stop being nervous and get over here,” Ren told him. Hux shuffled closer to the wall of the stall and pushed his half-hard length through the hole. Immediately a larger, warm hand wrapped around him and stroked Hux a few times, tugging Hux closer until his pelvis was against the cool wall. “Ginger, I like that.”

 

And before Hux could think of a way to reply to Ren’s comment about his pubic hair, Ren had wrapped his lips around the head of Hux’s cock and sucked. Hux released a shuddering exhale that morphed into a moan at the end and he canted his hips forward, trying to push more of himself through the hole in the wall. “Kriff that feels good,” he praised.

 

Ren smiled around his mouthful and something about that turned Hux on even more. “Told you,” Ren said, and lapped at Hux’s slit for a moment before descending again. It didn’t take long for Ren to bring Hux to full hardness, his mouth hot and wet and _very_ skilled. Hux wanted to see Ren’s face and lips but feeling it was enough to rile him up and tighten the coil of heat in his gut.

 

Hux clutched at the hem of his shirt for lack of something better to hold onto, his toes curling in his uniform shoes. Ren alternated between teasing the head of Hux’s cock with his lips and tongue, and taking Hux’s length as deep into his mouth as he could manage considering the wall blocking off the last inch. Ren was eager about his actions, no self-consciousness at all, and before Hux really wanted he felt himself getting close to the edge.

 

“ _Ren_ ,” Hux tried to warn but struggled to speak, his breathing growing harsh as his hips started to stutter forward on instinct. Ren gave a hum of either acknowledgement or encouragement and the vibration around his cock was enough to cause Hux’s whole body to tense up. He held his breath to try and silence his moans as he spilled himself in Ren’s mouth but his next inhale sounded distinctly shaky and loud.

 

Ren took his time swallowing Hux’s release down and then licking him clean with his tongue. Hux had both palms flat against the wall to keep himself stable as he shivered and groaned at the attention until he finally became oversensitive and pulled away. It was with trembling hands that Hux tucked himself away and zipped up his pants.

 

“Good?” Ren asked, though his tone implied that he already knew the answer.

 

Hux ran his fingers through his hair. “Very. Kriff.” Ren laughed and Hux smiled to himself.

 

There was a moment of silence between them and then Ren spoke up again. “You should probably get going before someone realizes the Commandant’s son is missing.”

 

All at once the smile vanished from Hux’s face. “Don’t call me that.”

 

“Sorry,” Ren mumbled.

 

“Don’t call me Armitage either,” Hux thought to add.

 

“Hux, then?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Hux knew Ren probably hadn’t meant any harm, but Hux’s post-orgasmic glow was gone and he realized he really should leave. Hux shouldn’t be laughing and smiling with Kylo Ren, the man he had just paid to suck him off in one of the school’s refreshers. It didn’t matter that this had probably been the most enjoyable conversation he had had in ages, or that Ren gave blow jobs like he was born to do it. This had been a business agreement and nothing more, and it wouldn’t do Hux any good pretending otherwise.

 

“Well…” Ren seemed to be deliberating on what to say. “Come again?” he said, and then laughed at his own joke.

 

Hux forced down his laugh and rolled his eyes. “You’re ridiculous.”

 

After checking to ensure his pants were done up and he didn’t look too dishevelled – minus the dried blood on his shirt collar – Hux stepped out of the stall. He grabbed another paper towel to wipe away the last of the dried blood on his chin, washed his hands and then, because he couldn’t think of anything to say, removed the mop handle from the door and left the refresher.

 

#

 

Hux thought about Ren in the refresher almost constantly after that, but wouldn't let himself go back. The blow job had been amazing but the memory of talking to Ren, tucked safely away from the cruel world for a few minutes, was just as enticing. Hux didn't have any friends at the Academy; no real ones anyway. Everyone either outwardly shunned him for the privilege they assumed he had being Brendol's son, or pretended to be his friend in hopes that he would get them an "in".

 

Ren had been different. He clearly didn't give a shit that Hux was the Commandant's son, and had even shown some compassion towards Hux after overhearing his run-in with the bullies. The paid-for blow job aside, Ren had acted like a genuine human being towards Hux. And how sad was it that Hux longed for something as basic as that after his years of growing up alone and unloved?

 

Hux knew himself and the fact that, like a touch-starved animal, if he wasn't careful he would latch onto Ren and seek something Ren was unwilling to give. So Hux avoided the refresher in the forgotten part of the Academy, focused on his studies and combat training and, when the bullies caught sight of him, Hux made sure to run in a different direction entirely.

 

The school year progressed. Once midterms passed and Hux completed every paper and physical test with top marks, he was made into one of the Commandant's Cadets. While there were loose rules built into the Academy's guidelines against favouritism, that didn't stop someone like Brendol Hux. It was a well-known fact that getting chosen to be part of this group put you on the fast track for early promotion within the First Order, a budding military group every student at the Academy vied to take part in.

 

Each member of the Commandant's Cadets was chosen because of their exceptional skills demonstrated throughout their schooling. They were to attend additional training classes and were each given a black greatcoat, marked with the First Order symbol on the upper sleeve. The fabric was coarse and warm and the collar was thick, enforced with black leather to hold it up against the buffering winds on Arkanis.

 

It didn't matter that Hux didn't want to wear the coat because it would single him out and alienate the rest of the student populace from him even more. Brendol Hux demanded he wear it and that was that.

 

The bullying got worse, of course. Brendol told Hux that running was beneath him, and an embarrassment to his namesake. Yet Hux was also warned that getting caught displaying violence against another student and getting expelled was just as unacceptable. Hux felt so confused and helpless about what he should do that the next time his tormenters cornered him, Jacob, Anthony and Todd had him on the ground before Hux even reacted.

 

Hux's instincts kicked in after that. Todd had his feet kicked out from under him and he landed like a stone on the ground, and Jacob got a boot heel to the kneecap. Anthony, the most timid of the trio that Hux hated all the more for sitting uselessly on the fence about the whole affair, stared at Hux with wide eyes and then kicked him in the stomach before Hux could deflect the hit. By then the other two had regained their footing and the three of them kicked and hit Hux until footsteps were heard at the end of the hall and they all ran off.

 

Hux was trying to catch his breath and pull himself into a seated position when he heard someone cursing and running toward him. Hux looked up and nearly cursed as well, watching Kylo Ren rushing to his side. The pain across his body was bad enough but Hux felt humiliated; he didn't want Ren to see him like this. There was nothing he could do to stop this from happening though and before Hux could utter a single word, Ren was kneeling beside him in the empty hall.

 

"Are you okay? Of course you're not okay, kriff," Ren answered his own question, looking frazzled. Hux saw he was in the Academy uniform but had taken plenty of liberties with the dress code: his black hair was wild and free, his tie undone around his neck, the top two buttons of his shirt undone to show a hint of his collarbones, and a flashy belt buckle around his waist that definitely wasn't regulation. "We'll break their ugly faces in, I promise."

 

"Just help me up," Hux grumbled, an arm wrapped protectively around his aching stomach.

 

Ren reached forward with hesitant hands and gently helped Hux into a fully seated and then standing position. Ren tried to pull one of Hux's arms around his shoulders but the angle had Hux's bruised ribcage stretching and a sharp gasp of pain escaped Hux. Ren instead wrapped an arm around Hux's waist, stabilizing some of his weight. "Come on, we'll get you cleaned up."

 

Going to the nurse's station would just lead to an injury report that was directed to Hux's father, so Hux followed Ren's lead and limped to the refresher he swore he would never return to. Once inside, Ren took Hux to the far side of the refresher where the windows were and carefully helped Hux into a seated position on the windowsill.

 

"Let me just..." Ren started to mumble and then trailed off when the door of the middle stall opened and a boy Hux didn't know peeked out. "Beat it. I'm closed for business right now." The boy with blond hair looked from Ren to Hux with wide eyes, taking in his injuries, pained scowl and identifying greatcoat.

 

Hux felt a thrill of fear race through his veins. What would happen if news spread that Hux had come to this refresher, carried by Ren no less? What would happen if gossip talked about how Hux had let himself get beaten to a pulp and hid away in the coat his father told the rest of the school meant that Hux was above them all? What if this information got back to Brendol?

 

Ren looked between them and then caught the boy's wrist before he could dash out of the room. "Listen Nathaniel, that Force promise still stands, alright? You didn't see anything in here."

 

The boy, Nathaniel, nodded frantically and then fled the refresher without another glance back at Hux. Ren trailed behind him and slid the mop handle through the door to keep it closed and then returned to the sink closest to where Hux sat. Hux watched Ren soak a wad of paper towels under the tap and pursed his lips. "A regular?"

 

"Now don't start with that," Ren chided as he wrung out the paper towels and then approached to wipe away the blood from Hux's newly split lip. "Jealousy is unbecoming on a face like yours."

 

"I'm not jealous," Hux defended. Ren raised an eyebrow at him but said nothing else, moving now to clean away the scraped skin and dirt on Hux's palms. Once Hux's exposed skin was cleaned up, Ren threw out the paper towels and reached for the buttons at the front of Hux's shirt. "What are you doing?" Hux flinched away.

 

"Checking for internal damage," Ren explained, gave Hux an impatient look and then reached for his buttons again.

 

Hux’s fingers curled anxiously around the ledge of the windowsill but he sat still as Ren undid the front of his shirt and pushed the fabric aside. Hux tensed at the first touch of Ren’s fingers to his skin, half expecting pain and half because Ren’s hands were cold from the tap water. But Ren’s skin was warmed up quickly by the heat of Hux’s own skin and his fingers were careful when they skimmed over Hux’s bare chest and abdomen.

 

“You’ll have a bunch of bruises but there’s only one rib I’m worried about,” Ren informed him, tapping a finger lightly against Hux’s lowest rib on the right where the pain felt sharper and more pronounced. “If you sit still I’ll heal it up.”

 

Hux wasn’t sure what that entailed but he did as he was told. Ren placed one hand on top of the rib and his other hand snuck beneath Hux’s shirt to hold the bare skin of Hux’s back as if trying to contain the injury between his two palms. At first there was nothing but as the seconds trickled by, Hux began to feel a building warmth between Ren’s palms that started to tingle. They remained like that for a few minutes and when Ren eventually removed his hands and Hux poked at his rib experimentally, he found there wasn’t even a hint of pain.

 

“How did you learn to do that?” he questioned as Ren stepped back to observe his work.

 

“Necessity,” Ren said simply. “I’ve gotten beat on plenty of times before and taught myself how to take care of the damage. Here, let me do this one as well.” Ren’s hands encircled a nasty bruise just above Hux’s right hip. Hux continued to sit rigidly in place, focused on the warm tingling feeling he associated with Ren’s healing abilities as well as the warmth Ren’s body was emanating with its proximity. When Ren was satisfied, he pulled away and washed his hands. “Like I said, you’ll still have a lot of bruises but they’re superficial.”

 

“Thanks for, you know…” Hux trailed off and shrugged. He started redoing the buttons of his shirt for lack of anything better to do. Hux was both surprised and grateful for Ren’s help but he didn’t understand Ren’s motivations. Did Ren expect to gain something from helping the Commandant’s son? It didn’t appear likely since Ren’s only focus seemed to be saving up to escape this place as soon as possible.

 

Ren leaned against the sink and looked Hux over. “I hate people like that. And I guess it’s not a perfect life even for the Commandant’s son.”

 

Hux snorted. “Hardly.” With that thought in mind he struggled out of the greatcoat and chucked it to the floor. “That thing might as well have a target on the back and restraints in the arms.”

 

To Hux’s surprise, Ren bent down and picked up the coat from the ground. He brushed away the dirt from the fabric and then silently wrapped the coat back around Hux’s shoulders like a mantle. Ren’s eyes were intense and serious. “You wear that coat and make your father regret it.”

 

Unsure how to react under Ren’s penetrating gaze, Hux glanced away. “He already threatens me with that daily, Ren.”

 

Ren touched a finger to the underside of Hux’s chin, turning his face back. “You don’t get it. That’s his weakness, not yours. He’s trying to confine you to something he can understand and control but you’re so much more than that,” Ren told him. “And one day you’re going to make him regret everything he put you through.”

 

“It’s not that easy,” Hux huffed. He was blushing under Ren’s focus but Hux didn’t dare look away. Ren was so close Hux could feel his body heat again. “He controls everything: my classes and hobbies, where I’ll get assigned when I graduate…”

 

“Someday you and I are going to be free of this place and we’ll make our own rules,” Ren promised him. “Until then you can’t let them win. You have to survive them.”

 

Ren said these things with such conviction that Hux struggled to doubt him. The fierceness of Ren’s determination was infectious, replacing Hux’s sense of helplessness with a budding feeling of power. Ren was right. It would be another year but eventually Hux would escape from beneath his father’s thumb and he would prove his worth, gain promotions with his own abilities and redefine the name _Hux_ on his own terms.

 

The rush of elation Hux felt at this thought consumed him so completely that he barely realized what he was doing until he felt his lips brush against Ren’s. It didn’t last; before Hux could even comprehend the sensation, Ren was nudging Hux back and away. “Easy there,” Ren laughed awkwardly.

 

Hux was mortified and he barely stopped himself from hiding his face in his hands. What the hell was wrong with him? “Sorry, that was a stupid thing to do,” he rushed to say. 

 

Ren seemed to recover from his surprise, though he still maintained extra space between them. “No harm, no foul,” he assured.

 

Hux kept his eyes on the floor as he slid his arms fully into the sleeves of his greatcoat. “I should go,” he said as he stood from the windowsill.

 

“Hux, hey,” Ren sighed and caught Hux’s upper arm, stopping him from bolting. “Don’t take it personally, okay? I just avoid attachments. Too many abandonment issues, plus it’s bad for business. Could you just look at me for two seconds?” Hux did, but said nothing. Ren sighed again. “You’re going to meet a great guy someday. But you don’t want that to be me. I’m not good for anything other than blow jobs. Okay?”

 

Internally Hux was considering just shelving the desire to ever have a happy romantic relationship entirely, but he didn’t say this aloud. “Okay,” he said. Hux knew Ren was trying to reject him as nicely as possible.

 

“Good,” Ren smiled. “And don’t you dare be a stranger. I was worried I had scared you off or something.”

 

“We’ll see,” Hux remained noncommittal. “Anyway, I really should go. Thanks again for your help.”

 

Ren let him go, perhaps realizing that he was fighting a losing battle. “Anytime, Hux.”

 

Hux removed the mop from the door and didn’t let himself look back as he left.


	2. Chapter 2

More time passed and Hux threw himself into his studies. The bullying continued but Hux became more vigilant to avoid them when he could, and when he couldn’t Hux used whatever fighting tactics he needed to minimize the damage he sustained. Hux’s anger simmered and built deep inside as he contained it and tried to hold himself back from lashing out with more force than he could explain in the name of ‘self-defence’.

 

Hux hated the bullies, hated his father, hated his special “Cadets”, hated the biased school, hated the judgemental students… Hux wanted the power and elation he had felt when Ren spoke his promises to Hux with conviction. Hux wanted the future Ren spoke of, where _he_ was the one in control for a change. Despite Ren’s rejection stinging, Hux had taken the man’s words to heart and he wore the greatcoat almost everywhere he went. Let it put a target on his back and restrict his movements; Hux would prove he could overcome all the shit thrown at him and come out on top.

 

He would make his tormentors regret thinking they could get away with everything, even if it took Hux years to find his revenge.

 

Between Hux trying to contain his mounting anger and manage his stress about first semester exams, the weeks before finals had Hux tense and on edge. Reasonably Hux knew that once finals were done he would have a two week holiday break where he could relax. But Hux also knew that the holiday break was a time to spend with all that remained of Hux’s family with Brendol ensuring everyone knew exactly how much of a disappointment Hux continued to be.

 

Hux knew he needed to release some tension, and the idea of how to accomplish that came to him one afternoon during his free period. It had been weeks since Ren had helped Hux after the bullies’ attack, and after Hux’s foolish attempt at a kiss. Who knew what Ren thought of Hux between that interaction and Hux’s disappearing act. Though Ren was the one who insisted he was good for nothing but a blow job, and that’s what Hux was seeking, so Hux decided it didn’t matter what Ren thought of him.

 

When Hux slowly stepped into the tucked-away refresher, he didn’t hear any noise indicating Ren was… already occupied. “Ren?” Hux called out tentatively, unsure if the other man was even in here.

 

He heard the rustle of pages like a book was getting closed and set aside. “Hux?”

 

“Yeah,” Hux confirmed and entered the middle stall after sliding the mop through the door handle.

 

“I was wondering if you’d ever come back,” Ren admitted. He didn’t sound upset that Hux _had_ come back.

 

“I realized I’ve been a bit tense lately,” Hux said and pulled the right number of credits from his pocket to hold up to the hole in the stall wall. “I have the credits.”

 

“Say no more.” Ren took the credits in his fingers and set them wherever he kept his money in the other stall. Hux pulled himself out of his pants and pushed his cock through the hole. “Half hard already,” Ren commented lightly. “Been thinking about this, have you?”

 

“No comment.”

 

“’ _No comment_ ’ is just as telling, you know,” Ren chuckled.

 

“Yeah well—” Hux’s retort got lost in a loud moan of pleasure when Ren took Hux’s full length into his mouth in one go and sucked hard. “ _Kriff_ , Ren,” Hux groaned and splayed his hands against the wall as his hips pushed forward. Hux got hard so quickly it almost hurt, Ren swallowing down Hux’s cock like he was starved for it. Hux clenched his eyes closed, wishing he wasn’t making such needy noises on each exhale but unable to stop it.

 

Ren pulled his mouth off with a wet noise and started tonguing at Hux’s slit, no doubt tasting Hux’s precome already. “You sound really hot,” Ren told him, his voice rough from the abuse to his throat. Hux wondered if dirty talk was part of the 50 credit fee but didn’t ask. He didn’t want to know if Ren told everyone they sounded hot. Besides, Ren had taken Hux back into his mouth and Hux didn’t want him to stop.

 

Ren’s vigour didn’t abate and before long Hux found himself thrusting roughly against the wall, desperate to fuck Ren’s throat raw. Ren seemed turned on by it, moaning around the head of Hux’s cock and bobbing his head quickly. Hux was panting now, his attention narrowed to the feeling of Ren’s lips and tongue on and around him. “Ren, I’m close,” he warned breathlessly.

 

Hux felt Ren wrap a few fingers around his cock to squeeze and then stroke him while Ren’s lips wrapped around his head. Hux rocked into it, overwhelmed with how good it felt to let go and just enjoy this, and how amazing Ren was at pushing Hux right to the edge. Ren teased him, keeping Hux right on the edge but not letting him tumble over, and Hux whined.

 

With that noise Ren gave in and took Hux to the back of his throat with one deep swallow. Hux came with a cry and then continued to moan as he felt Ren swallow around him repeatedly. When Hux was spent he slumped to his knees on the floor, trying to catch his breath. “You taste good,” Ren mumbled after a moment.

 

“Don’t kriffing lie,” Hux said with a shake of his head.

 

“I’m not lying,” Ren insisted. “I like tasting you.” Hux blushed and stayed silent, not knowing what to say to that. After a long moment Ren spoke again. “Will you come again, sooner this time?”

 

Hux laughed at Ren’s stupid puns, his smile lingering. “Yeah, I think I will.”

 

#

 

It became a weekly routine, though first semester finals and the holiday break threw a temporary wrench in that plan. By the time the new year and second semester began, Hux was itching to get back to the forgotten refresher and Ren. Hux had a free period two afternoons a week and in his mind, (and he thought maybe in Ren’s mind too because no one else ever showed up looking for service when Hux was there) that became _their time_.

 

At first Hux told himself to be reasonable and only go once a week but a few weeks into the semester Hux ended up in the refresher’s middle stall during both of his free periods. It kept Hux’s ongoing frustrations and stress appeased, and continued to fund Ren’s escape plan. Not that Hux was particularly okay with the thought of Ren one day disappearing without a trace; which was something he came to terms with more and more with each passing week.

 

Hux knew Ren had already made his lack of interest in a romantic relationship with him clear. But that didn’t stop Hux’s affection for Ren from growing. It certainly started with lust; Ren fulfilling his promise over and over to provide the best head of Hux's life. However, with Hux having free periods he began to linger after he had tucked away his spent cock and Ren didn’t send him away. They started to talk and learn more about one another, and that made things infinitely more complicated.

 

Because Ren wasn’t just a pair of skilled lips. He was sharply intelligent and aware of the injustices of the world. Ren’s Force powers already sounded impressive and that was without any formal training. Ren spoke about his desire to find a Master to help him harness that power and Hux wanted that for him. More than anything though, Ren talked about proving himself to the world and finding a place where he belonged and Hux could relate because that’s what he longed for as well.

 

In one way it was easy for Hux to hide his growing feelings because Hux always stayed in his stall and Ren was always on the other side of the wall. So close and yet so far away. They didn’t run into each other in the many hallways of the Academy again, which was probably for the best because Hux knew he would probably end up staring at Ren’s lips after how many times he’d envisioned them around his cock.

 

In another way it was so incredibly challenging to keep what he was feeling from Ren’s awareness. In the heat of the moment with Ren’s mouth on his dick, Hux struggled to mute everything he shouldn’t say. He had become more vocal while Ren sucked him off since Ren seemed to enjoy it more as well judging by the way he moaned around his mouthful, but more than once Hux had to bite his lip before he accidentally told Ren what other activities he wanted to happen between them.

 

Even after Hux was finished and they sat and talked it was becoming increasingly difficult for Hux to remember that he was effectively a client and, at most, they were bizarre friends. Hux had lost count of the times he almost suggested they spend time together outside of the refresher, face to face. And every time Ren talked about buying a ship and leaving, Hux barely managed to swallow his quiet plea for Ren to take Hux with him.

 

“You seem quiet today,” Ren commented, startling Hux from his reverie.

 

“Sorry, just thinking,” Hux mumbled. The spring formal dance for seniors was coming up in a month and Hux had been thinking idly of how everyone would react if Hux showed up with Ren on his arm – or vice versa – and Hux’s Cadets greatcoat around his shoulders. Hux would probably get beaten black and blue by his father for such a stunt but Hux was almost certain it would be worth it.

 

“Anything you want to talk about?” Ren offered, though Hux knew Ren well enough now to know Ren was curious.

 

Hux checked his chronometer, realizing he would have to leave soon to get to his next class on time. Of course Hux wanted to talk to Ren about this; about all of it. But more than that he wanted to be able to keep coming back to this little sanctuary he had found, and he wouldn’t do anything to risk Ren sending him away. “No.”

 

"Oh, okay," Ren said, sounding sad.

 

Hux's chest ached. He didn't want to upset Ren. "It's not important," he insisted.

 

"If you say so, Hux."

 

 _I love you_ , Hux's mind silently proclaimed. _You're loved_. _I want you to know._

 

"I have to go," Hux said. Not even because his next class was starting soon, but because Hux was scared that these thoughts were starting to become louder than the rational side of his brain reminding him why he couldn't say those things. "I'll visit on Thursday?" Hux added hesitantly when Ren said nothing more.

 

"Sure."

 

"Ren—" Hux began and then bit his tongue.

 

"...Yeah?" Ren seemed to perk up slightly.

 

Hux's lips mouthed the words he wanted to say, and then instead said, "Take care of yourself."

 

He heard Ren sigh on the other side of the wall, but his voice seemed to lighten. "You too, Hux."

 

#

 

"Ren, stop kriffing teasing! _Oh stars_ , Ren, _please_."

 

They had been at this long enough that Hux _knew_ Ren's jaw must be aching, because Hux's lower back definitely was. Ren made no complaints though. In fact, he was the one who was drawing this out, squeezing Hux at the base of his cock each time Hux's breath hitched in order to stave off his orgasm. The result was that Hux had been on the brink of climax for over five minutes now and he was starting to lose his sanity.

 

Ren kissed the tip of Hux's cock. "Please what? Tell me what you want, Hux."

 

"You," Hux moaned.

 

Ren's tongue traced the vein on the underside of Hux's throbbing length. "You have me," he said. Ren's voice was husky from abuse.

 

Hearing those words in Ren's deep voice nearly tipped Hux over the edge but Ren squeezed him again and Hux groaned, slamming a hand against the wall separating them. "All of you," Hux practically sobbed. "Kriff, I want to watch your lips spread around me and kiss them after until they bruise. I want to fuck you and fill you up when I finish."

 

The hand on Hux's cock didn't disappear, but Ren's mouth pulled away. Before Hux could even catch his breath to begin his apology, he heard a shuddering inhale and a quiet, "Okay."

 

"Wait," Hux panted, "Really?" It felt like he had whiplash from being so caught off guard.

 

"Yes," Ren whispered and then cleared his throat. "Get your ass over here."

 

Hux didn't need to be told twice. Cock hanging out of the front of his pants, Hux fumbled to open the lock on his stall and pulled open the door of Ren's stall. He found Ren on his knees beside the wall of the stall, his pants unzipped and a hand circled loosely around his own erection. Ren's skin was flushed and his lips were swollen, and Hux fell in love even more. "You are a beautiful sight," he praised as he descended.

 

Ren tilted his face upward and met Hux's kiss. Ren's lips were still wet and Hux could faintly taste the result of his own arousal in Ren's mouth, but it didn't bother him. Instead he leaned in and deepened the kiss, digging his fingers into the wild mane of Ren's hair. Ren moaned and opened his mouth invitingly, which Hux gladly accepted as his tongue began to explore greedily. At the same time Hux's hand knocked away Ren's own and stroked Ren's cock, thrilled to feel it throbbing in his grasp.

 

Hux stroked and kissed Ren until Ren squirmed and pulled his lips away. "Don't make me wait any longer, Hux," Ren begged, eyes dark and hungry. "I want you to fuck me."

 

Hux reeled Ren into another kiss just to feel Ren open up for him. Then he paused to catch his breath. "Do you have lube?"

 

Ren nodded and pointed at the small messenger bag settled precariously on top of the toilet paper dispenser. "In there."

 

Hux looked back at Ren and held both hands out. "Let's get you up first," he said. Hux knew that Ren's legs had probably cramped up after how long he had been on his knees so Hux braced to support him as Ren took his offered hands. Ren was unsteady and hissed with pain when his legs fully straightened, and Hux led him to sit on the toilet seat lid before he fell. Hux kissed Ren again, just because he could, and then he grabbed the lube from Ren's bag.

 

"My legs need another minute before I can bend over," Ren admitted but held a hand out, beckoning Hux closer. "Come here."

 

Hux stepped between Ren's stretched-out legs and moaned loudly when Ren ducked his head to renew the blow job that had gotten interrupted. With his free hand Hux brushed his fingers through Ren's hair, pushing it away to leave an unobstructed view of Ren's full lips spreading around the girth of Hux's length. "You really are too good at this," Hux accused but laughed when Ren smiled around him. "I won't last long once I'm inside you," Hux warned. He could already feel his orgasm beginning to build again with Ren's ministrations.

 

His cock fell from Ren's slick mouth with a wet noise and Ren looked up at him. "I don't think I will either. Just give me two fingers," Ren said as he stood up again, stretched out his legs and then leaned against the wall.

 

"Are you sure?" Hux asked. First he tugged Ren's pants and underwear down to his knees and then shimmied his own pants and underwear out of the way. Then he opened the lube and slicked up two fingers.

 

"I'll come on your fingers if you tease me long enough to get to three," Ren said. Already Ren looked wrecked, with his mussed hair, blown irises and flushed skin.

 

Hux wasn't going to argue. He pressed one finger against Ren's hole and although Ren was tight, he took the finger with ease. Hux rallied whatever patience he had left to not rush the prep, not wanting to hurt Ren now that everything Hux had been hoping for was coming true. But when Hux wiggled a second finger in and Ren started to ride down on both fingers, forcing them deeper, Hux started to lose any remaining semblance of restraint.

 

Hux withdrew his fingers and coated his length in more lube. Then he took himself in hand and lined up the head of his cock against Ren's stretched hole. There was a second of resistance where Hux continued his gentle pressure and Ren released a deep breath and then Hux slipped inside and they both groaned. Hux bottomed out with a series of shallow thrusts until his hips were flush with Ren's ass and he was fully sheathed.

 

After that their pace turned frantic and needy. Ren reached a hand back to grip and squeeze Hux's ass – a silent request for _deeper_ – and Hux wrapped both arms around Ren. One of his hands encircled Ren's weeping cock and his other hand pressed against Ren's abdomen, holding them flush together as they ground against one another. The refresher echoed with the sounds of skin slapping together and their breathless panting and moans.

 

"You feel so good, Ren," Hux pressed his face against the strip of bare skin at the back of Ren's neck. Then he bit down and sucked at that burning skin, overcome with the desire to mark Ren as his own.

 

" _Hux—_ " Whatever Ren was going to say next was lost to a long, drawn out moan when Ren suddenly stiffened.

 

Hux felt Ren's come spilling in his hand as he continued to stroke Ren through it. The noises Ren was making combined with the sensation of Ren's body clenching rhythmically around his cock dragged Hux over the edge as well. A weak cry escaped Hux as he buried his seed deep within Ren's ass, his hips twitching forward instinctively until he was fully spent.

 

Carefully Hux withdrew his softening cock from Ren's body and he grabbed a wad of toilet paper for each of them to clean up. Hux wiped up whatever evidence of their climaxes was on his pelvis and palm and then focused on helping Ren clean up the rest. They threw the soiled toilet paper out and then they both zipped up their pants. Ren slumped with his back now against the wall. " _Kriff_ ," Ren exhaled and laughed.

 

Hux laughed too and stepped back into Ren's personal space. Shyly he looped an arm between Ren's lower back and the wall. Hux was encouraged when Ren didn't move away from the embrace, and he made himself ask: "have you ever done this with another... patron?" Hux wanted to know what this meant for them, if anything, but also didn't want to piss Ren off while they were still in their afterglow.

 

Ren pursed his lips as if considering whether or not to be offended, and then shook his head. "No, I haven't."

 

Hux thought back to the first sight he had of Ren on his knees in the stall, hand wrapped around his cock. "Do you jerk off while giving other people blow jobs?"

 

Ren shifted his weight slightly but he still didn't pull away. "I've done it the last few times with you but..." Ren worried his bottom lip, "never with anyone else. And Hux, you should know..." Hux noticed a blush overtaking Ren's cheeks and he leaned in closer, hanging on Ren's every word. "There hasn't been anyone else for weeks."

 

Hux felt something akin to a starburst in his chest, his heart swelling with adoration. He still had so many questions but Hux shelved them long enough to lean in and kiss Ren sweetly, affection rather than arousal his driving motivator. Ren held the back of Hux's neck with a hand and returned the kiss, both of them tentative but no less warm or caring.

 

Eventually though they needed to part for air, and Hux voiced his internal thoughts. "I'm so confused though," he admitted. "You stopped me before."

 

Ren rubbed the back of his neck self-consciously. “I wanted the best for you and I worried I wasn’t it. I really do have abandonment and attachment issues,” Ren confessed and then glanced at Hux from beneath his lashes. “But that didn’t stop me from falling in love with you.” 

 

Hux’s breath caught in his throat, his brain jittery with excitement. “I fell in love with you too,” he rushed to say, wanting Ren to know and never doubt it. “But I’m not perfect either. I was scared you’d reject me again and tell me I couldn’t come back. The thought of not being able to talk to you anymore…” Hux grimaced.

 

Ren grabbed Hux’s hips and spun them around, pinning Hux to the wall and kissing him so forcefully that Hux thought he might get hard again. Hux returned the kiss until Ren separated their lips, Ren studying Hux’s face intently. “I was too scared to ask before, but now…” Ren took a deep breath. “Will you leave with me after we graduate?”

 

Hux heart was still pounding in his chest. “Leave where?”

 

“Over the holidays a Force wielder made contact with me who offered to teach me everything he knew,” Ren explained. “He gave me the money to buy a ship and told me to come immediately but I told Snoke I wouldn’t leave without you.” Ren blushed at this statement but remained serious.

 

Something clicked in Hux’s mind and he frowned. “Snoke?” he clarified. “As in, the Supreme Leader of the First Order, Snoke?”

 

Ren nodded, looking proud of himself now. “Snoke promised that if I agreed to train under him, he would get you promoted well and independently of whatever your father tried to decide for you. He wants to give us both power, Hux. And now that you’ve chosen me despite my fears that I had ruined my only chance,” Ren kissed Hux again, fast and hungry, “I want to make you happy.”

 

It was a lot to take in all at once. Realizing Ren’s feelings had been building for Hux in tandem with Hux’s feelings for Ren in return. Appreciating the fact that Hux didn’t have to try to contain or mute his affection for Ren any longer and could actually explore this relationship more. And acknowledging that when he graduated in a few months he could _actually_ be free from his father and his influence, rather than waiting for the man to die or for Hux to eventually be promoted beyond Brendol’s reach.

 

“Unless you don’t want to…” Ren worried aloud.

 

Hux realized he had been so caught up in his thoughts his face had been blank and not exactly encouraging. Hux refocused on the present and gave Ren a wide smile. “Of course I want to,” he promised. Hux felt himself getting more excited by the minute. “Can we leave now?”

 

Ren laughed and kissed him again. “Snoke said it would be better if we both graduated just so no one in the military can hold our lack of degree against us. You in particular, considering the positions you’re vying for. I figure it’s only a few more months.”

 

Hux nodded his understanding and agreement. There were so many things he wanted to do and share with Ren now that the option was open to him, but Hux knew he had to wait. Sleeping in barrack-style dorms left no room for midnight visitors to your bed and, despite how liberating it felt knowing Hux would soon be free of his father and the bullies, he had to be smart until that time. He wouldn’t risk losing Ren.

 

“You know a few weeks ago when you commented on how quiet I was?” Hux asked.

 

Ren considered him, clearly curious. “Yeah.”

 

“I was imagining what it would be like to take you to the spring formal,” Hux admitted.

 

Ren gave him a crooked smile. “Wouldn’t that be a sight? Your father would probably have a heart attack.”

 

Hux chuckled but then his mood turned slightly sombre. “No doubt. But it would be nice being able to spend time with you without having to hide, you know?”

 

Ren hummed in thought. “Let me take you somewhere on that night.”

 

“I’ll be expected to attend the formal,” Hux hedged. Not that he was particularly excited to go, but until he was free he had to continue playing the dutiful son lest anyone get suspicious.

 

“We’ll both go and then we’ll sneak out,” Ren suggested. “It’ll be great; trust me.”

 

Hux couldn’t deny Ren much of anything, especially when he was looking at Hux with both warmth and excitement. “Alright,” Hux agreed, and smiled into the next kiss Ren stole from his lips.


	3. Chapter 3

Time continued to pass, though at a much faster rate now that Hux was no longer agonizing over what he thought were unrequited feelings. Hux and Ren both agreed that despite their displeasure at the idea, it was better to avoid being seen together in public. The bullies never seemed to get bored of confronting Hux, and Hux also didn’t need to give his father anymore reasons to breathe down his neck.

 

Hux continued to visit Ren in their little sanctuary of the unused refresher during his free periods, though he now entered Ren’s stall instead of the middle stall. Ren genuinely seemed to enjoy giving Hux blow jobs and Hux wasn’t going to argue, always quick to hardness and completion between Ren’s skill and the sight of his cock filling Ren’s mouth while Hux clutched at his hair. Hux was always happy to return the favour, whether with his mouth or a hand or waiting for his body to recover so he could fuck Ren against the wall.

 

They also continued to talk more, sharing more intimate details about their hopes and fears as they grew closer. Although the refresher was generally clean, Ren snuck in a blanket so they could sit side by side on the floor. Hux found that Ren liked to wrap an arm around Hux’s shoulders or waist and Hux quickly warmed up to the physical affection, leaning into Ren’s side to feel as close as possible.

 

By the time the spring formal arrived, Hux was genuinely excited to dress up and look his best because he knew Ren would see him and that they would sneak away together later in the evening. Beneath his greatcoat Hux wore his best dress uniform and attached each pin that symbolized special recognition from the Academy for his exemplary marks and abilities in field training to his left breast. At his father's insistence Hux slicked his hair back in an orderly manner, though Hux doubted it would stay that way for long once Ren's fingers got to it.

 

That thought was enough to override Hux's dread about enduring hours of small talk and Hux walked into the large auditorium with squared shoulders and his head held high. The auditorium where school-wide announcements and celebrations were usually held had been decorated with streamers and confetti. The lights were dimmed and music was already blaring from speakers on the stage. Hux saw that there were tables around the perimeter of the room with the centre cleared to provide a makeshift dance floor for couples.

 

Hux wasn't early but he wasn't late either. There were already quite a few couples dancing to the music, girls' dresses swirling and boys' shoes showing their polished gleam in the coloured spotlights rotating randomly. In fifteen minutes Hux's father would give an opening address to the students; something Hux absolutely was not allowed to miss. After that everyone would sit at the tables for dinner and then more dancing and games would occur.

 

Hux made his way over to the bar set up near the stage and ordered himself a drink to sip. A few people came up to Hux to talk and Hux indulged them for lack of something better to do. At one point Hux saw Jacob, Todd and Anthony eyeing him from across the room but they quickly lost interest; they weren't stupid enough to start something with chaperones and the Commandant overseeing the whole event.

 

A few minutes before the Commandant's speech, Hux glanced at the door and promptly forgot to pay attention to what Julie, one of the girls in Hux's Advanced Tactics class, was saying. Because Ren had just stepped into the room and he looked utterly riveting. Instead of a dress uniform Ren was dressed in a tuxedo that spoke more of political clout, his white shirt crisp beneath the ironed lapels of his suit jacket. Ren's hair wasn't tied back but it had been tamed, and he had what looked like two golden rings woven into a few black curls.

 

Ren's eyes sought and found Hux, and Ren offered a small smile across the room. Hux returned it and then forced himself to turn back to Julie with an apology on his lips, knowing he and Ren couldn't draw attention and suspicion from everyone else in attendance. It was hard to not react when Ren walked behind him and brushed a hand against Hux's lower back on his way to the bar, but Hux managed.

 

When Hux's father walked towards the centre of the stage and cleared his throat, Julie excused herself to go find her friends and Hux remained where he was. Hux was equally nervous and thrilled when Ren came to stand by Hux's elbow silently, both of them facing the stage as the Commandant began his welcome speech. Anyone who cared to look would see Hux and Ren together and yet they would have no idea about the invisible bonds between them. Hux and Ren stood close but not inappropriately so, and it wasn't particularly suspicious for them to grab two chairs side by side at one of the back tables to eat once food was served.

 

They maintained a reasonable distance even though all Hux wanted to do was be in Ren's arms somewhere dark and warm, talking and kissing as the mood struck them. At last when most of the other students had congregated on the dance floor Ren's fingers brushed Hux's knee under the table. Ren leaned in close to Hux's ear and said, "I'm going to our spot. Meet me there in five minutes."

 

And then Ren was pulling away, standing from his chair smoothly and walking out of the room with no one sending him a second look. Hux remained where he sat and finished his drink, mentally counting down the minutes. When he was certain everyone had forgotten Ren and weren't paying attention to him, Hux made his own exit from the auditorium. The halls were empty and Hux let himself walk a little quickly as he made his way to their meeting spot.

 

Ren was there waiting for him, leaning against the wall just inside the refresher. Before Hux could say anything, Ren was framing Hux's face with his hands and kissing Hux like it was the end of days. Hux moaned into the kiss but pulled back, heart racing and lips spreading wide with a smile. "Let's get out of here."

 

Ren grinned and laced his fingers with Hux's own. To Hux's surprise, instead of leaving through the door he was instead pulled to the windows where Ren had gotten one of the panes of glass loosened while he waited. Soon they were both dashing across the darkened Academy lawn and into the thick forest that bordered the southern part of the school. Ren's hand was still holding Hux's own and in that moment Hux didn't care where they went as long as they were together.

 

"Hang on," Ren paused when they were fully in the forest and the tree canopy was getting thick enough to block out the moonlight. For a moment there was nothing but darkness, a sigh of the wind through the trees and some bugs chirping softly in the tall grass. Then all at once a small orb of glowing red light formed an inch above Ren's outstretched palm, providing a halo of light around them both.

 

"What's that?" Hux asked with wide eyes.

 

"The newest trick I learned with the Force," Ren proclaimed proudly. "It's just condensed energy."

 

"That's amazing, Ren," Hux said and meant it. Though he felt a twinge of jealousy that Ren could harness such raw power from within himself and the environment, Hux was happier knowing that Ren was getting the chance to learn more about his abilities. Hux would find his own power, and his own place; ideally with Ren at his side.

 

Their hands found the other again and then they continued on through the trees, guided by the red orb glowing over their heads and highlighting rocks and tree roots. Hux could tell that Ren was following a specific path but Hux didn't ask, and was surprised when they came upon an old, sagging shed. Ren let go of Hux's hand and approached the shed, yanking open the creaky door to reveal what was inside.

 

"You have a speeder?" Hux gaped.

 

“I’ve been restoring it over the years,” Ren said as he pulled it out of the shed. While the shed looked decrepit, the speeder was clearly well cared for. “She runs like a beauty now. Hop on.” Hux did as he was told, sliding into the seat behind Ren. He used the opportunity to wrap his arms around Ren’s middle, pulling their bodies close together. The air around them was warm but Hux still enjoyed feeling Ren’s body heat mingling with his own. “You ready?”

 

“Ready,” Hux confirmed, clinging to Ren a bit tighter.

 

The engine roared to life and then they were off. Hux didn’t know how Ren managed to weave through the trees at such high speeds without colliding with anything but he trusted in Ren and said nothing. It was exhilarating feeling the speeder vibrating below him and the wind whipping by to indicate just how fast they were moving. Hux had what he would consider a healthy fear of death but in this moment it felt to Hux like he and Ren were immortal: powerful and free.

 

They rode for what was probably ten minutes and then Ren started to slow down. Hux saw why when they reached the edge of a large lake and started to circle the perimeter. Even though Hux had grown up on Arkanis he hadn’t known this little lake in the middle of the forest existed. The moons and stars reflected off the undisturbed water and Hux could almost pretend that there was no one in the world except them.

 

Ren parked the speeder against a tree on the edge of a clearing where the trees opened up and there was a patch of soft grass on a hill overlooking the lake. Ren got off the speeder first and then offered a hand, which Hux took because he wanted to rather than out of necessity. His legs were shaking from adrenaline, which also fuelled a burning arousal in his gut that had Hux pressing his body against Ren’s and kissing him deeply.

 

Ren kissed him back, almost immediately opening his mouth for their tongues to brush together. But all too soon Ren pulled away, causing Hux to give a displeased whine. “Hang on, I brought a blanket for us to lie on,” Ren explained, pecking Hux’s lips chastely before leaving Hux’s embrace entirely to open up the travel pack attached to the back of the speeder. Ren’s energy orb had vanished when they were on the speeder and now with an unobstructed view of the moons, it was no longer needed for them to see.

 

They got the blanket unfurled and spread out on the grass, and then Hux found himself flat on his back with Ren above him. Ren seemed particularly riled up judging by the way he nipped and sucked at Hux’s lips and neck while their groins rocked together, and Hux wasn’t going to complain. He slipped his hands beneath Ren’s suit jacket and yanked his shirttails from the waistband of his pants. After that Hux’s fingers explored the bare skin of Ren’s back greedily, nails digging in when Ren found an exceptionally sensitive bit of skin to mark.

 

“You looked amazing tonight,” Ren told Hux when his mouth wasn’t busy. “I wanted to get on my knees and suck you off in front of everyone.”

 

“It’s a good thing you didn’t because I’m not sure I could’ve made myself stop you,” Hux laughed breathlessly, hips rising to press against the friction and heat Ren’s body provided. “I nearly lost it when I saw you,” Hux admitted in return.

 

Hux’s shirt was shoved halfway up his abdomen and Ren was nipping teasingly at the skin around Hux’s navel. “Hux…” Ren began and then trailed off, looking up the length of Hux’s body at him nervously. “I wanted to ask if you’d let me fuck you.”

 

Hux felt his own rush of nerves at Ren’s question. Hux had never been on the bottom before and he was a little scared that it would hurt. But at the same time, if there was anyone Hux would ever trust to take their time in preparing him and doing it right, it was Ren. “Okay,” he agreed quietly, watching as Ren’s eyes widened. “But go slow.”

 

Ren surged forward and kissed Hux with his full body weight behind it. Then Ren peppered kisses to Hux’s cheeks, jaw and back down his neck. “I’m going to make it so good for you, I promise,” Ren murmured, kissing every inch of Hux’s skin he could easily reach. “Trust me.”

 

“I do,” Hux promised, which earned him another kiss so feverish that it made his head spin.

 

They worked on undressing one another without tearing any fabric or breaking off any buttons so that they could look somewhat presentable when they eventually returned to the Academy. Ren withdrew a container of lube from his jacket pocket but set it aside until they were fully nude. Even though they were too far away from the school for anyone to stumble upon them, and no one was looking for them, there was something about being naked in the open with Ren that had Hux’s cock hardening further.

 

Once they were both stripped, Hux expected Ren to reach for the lube. Instead, Ren gripped Hux’s hips and started to turn him over. Hux hesitated but followed Ren’s lead until he was on his hands and knees on the blanket, bare ass on display with Ren kneeling behind him. Hux was about to remind Ren that he needed some preparation first, but all that escaped his mouth was a loud moan when Ren pulled apart Hux’s cheeks with his hands and his tongue brushed against Hux’s hole.

 

“Oh kriff,” Hux huffed and then let his head hang between his arms.

 

Encouraged, Ren flattened his tongue fully against Hux’s skin and started to lap at him teasingly. Hux squirmed, seeking as much as Ren would give him. He wanted to reach down and stroke his weeping length but didn’t trust himself not to come too soon with this sort of stimulation. Out in the middle of nowhere Hux didn’t silence his noises of pleasure, especially when they seemed to egg Ren on. Ren pushed his tongue inside Hux’s body and started to fuck him that way. All Hux could do was moan and tremble.

 

After a while, just when Hux was beginning to debate with himself if he should warn Ren or just ride Ren’s tongue until he finished, Ren pulled away. “We need to do that again,” Hux said, trying his best to not complain about Ren stopping.

 

“We will,” Ren agreed and kissed Hux’s lower back. Then he grabbed the lube, slicking up two fingers at once. Hux lowered himself from his hands to his forearms and tried to relax when he felt one finger probe at his entrance. The first finger didn’t actually hurt. More than anything it just felt odd having Ren’s finger pushing inside him and brushing his insides, spreading lube around. The second finger stung a bit but the pain didn’t last long when Ren pressed more kisses to Hux’s skin and reminded him to relax.

 

Ren went slow and by the time Hux was stretched open on three of Ren’s fingers, he was begging for more. “Ren, please, I’m ready.”

 

“I want to be sure,” Ren hedged, twisting and curling his fingers in a way that made Hux tense and groan.

 

“ _I’m_ sure,” Hux insisted. “I want to feel you inside me.”

 

Ren released a shuddering breath. “Kriff, fine,” Ren surrendered and withdrew his fingers to grab more lube, “but I want to see your face.”

 

Hux had no issues with that request and rolled over on his own. He found a comfortable patch of grass under the blanket to lie on and spread his legs. Hux watched Ren stroke lube over his cock while looking over Hux’s body. Arousal drowning out his nerves now, Hux reached down and fisted himself a few times just to take the edge off. Ren’s eyes focused on the sight until he shuffled forward to kneel between Hux’s legs.

 

Hux had been prepared well so the first push of Ren’s cock into his body was more pressure than pain. Ren held Hux’s hips to angle them while he sank in slowly, and Hux focused on taking deep breaths and relaxing as much as he could. When Ren finally bottomed out and their bodies were pressed together, Ren leaned down but hesitated an inch above Hux’s lips. “Sorry, I forgot, my mouth…”

 

It didn’t take more than a second thought before Hux decided he didn’t care enough about their earlier activities for it to stop him from kissing Ren. “I’ll survive,” he said and pulled Ren down the rest of the way, locking their lips together as Hux’s body continued to adjust to being so full.

 

Ren moaned and started to thrust shallowly in and out until Hux moaned, signalling that it felt good and he wanted more. After that Ren sat back for more leverage and thrust into Hux harder, slamming his hips against Hux’s ass over and over. Hux angled his hips up to seek more and whined when one of Ren’s thrusts pushed the head of his cock against Hux’s prostate. “There, again,” he begged, rocking down on Ren’s length shamelessly.

 

Ren adjusted his angle and slowed his thrusts, though he also made them deeper. After a few attempts, Ren found the right angle and soon almost every thrust hit Hux’s prostate. Hux squirmed and panted, fingers fisted in the blanket since he couldn’t reach Ren’s hair. It felt so good to open himself up to Ren like this, trusting him and sharing the most intimate parts of himself with Ren. Hux wanted to be able to do this all the time, to cry out his pleasure rather than mute his moans in the refresher.

 

“I love you so much,” Ren told him, voice rough from exertion but heartfelt and warm.

 

“I love you too,” Hux said in return, reaching out. Ren leaned down into his embrace, holding himself up on one hand while his other hand wrapped around Hux’s cock. Hux gasped and bucked up into the combined sensations of Ren’s hand and cock. He could tell Ren was getting close and it wasn’t going to take much for Hux to finish either. Hux buried his fingers in Ren’s hair and whispered, “I want you to fill me.”

 

A string of curses intermixed with Hux’s name fell from Ren’s lips, interrupted by gulps for air Ren seemed to be struggling for. And then Ren was stiffening above Hux, body tense and hips jerking forward shallowly while Ren moaned loudly. Hux moaned too when he felt Ren’s release inside him, filling him up and making each thrust slick and wet-sounding. Ren stroked Hux’s cock more roughly during his orgasm which promptly pushed Hux over the edge as well. Hux spilled his seed across Ren’s hand and clenched around Ren’s twitching length rhythmically until his body recovered.

 

Hux hissed when Ren withdrew from his body, feeling sore but satisfied. Ren lay down on the blanket beside him and Hux curled up against Ren’s side, both of them sharing warmth. Hux held himself up on one elbow and kissed Ren softly, who kissed him back with an obvious lethargy that made Hux smile. Ren looped an arm around Hux’s body to hold him closer and Hux was about to rest his head on Ren’s shoulder when the moonlight glinted off the golden rings in Ren’s hair.

 

“What are these?” he asked curiously, his fingers toying with one of the rings woven into Ren’s hair.

 

“Oh!” Ren made a noise of surprise, like he had forgotten something important, and reached both hands up to pluck the rings from his hair. Then Ren glanced away and fiddled with the rings, obviously self-conscious. “Um…”

 

“Tell me?” Hux requested quietly, prompting more than pushing.

 

Ren sat up and Hux mimicked the posture. Then Ren held both rings out to Hux in his palm. Both gold bands were identical, thick and sturdy but carved with vine-like patterns. Similarly, each ring had a dark stone set into the band. In the moonlight Hux could tell that the stones had a red hue to them, though it was impossible to tell the exact shading without proper lighting. Hux took one of the rings and felt the weight of it in his palm. It felt like it was emanating a slight warmth but Hux wasn’t sure if that was just because of its previous proximity to Ren’s body.

 

“I stole these before I got sent away,” Ren explained quietly, fingers curling around the ring Hux had left. “The rings were made with two halves of the crystal that had been in the lightsaber of my grandfather, Darth Vader. Even if I was unwanted by my parents, Vader’s blood runs through my veins and these rings were my right, so I took them.”

 

Hux looked the ring over in the moonlight. “It’s quite lovely.”

 

“It’s yours,” Ren said, and then elaborated when Hux looked over at him sharply. “I want you to have it.”

 

“Ren, this is…” Hux looked between Ren and the ring. “This is a family heirloom and clearly very important to you. I couldn’t possibly accept it…”

 

Ren was looking more anxious now, though he also had a determined expression on his face. “You are also very important to me, which is why I wanted to offer you this ring, if you’ll accept it. Being made from two pieces of the same crystal creates a bond between the two rings and their wearers. It’s supposed to be worn by a mated couple. I know it may seem fast but since I met you I swear a part of me knew we were meant to be together.”

 

Hux felt a blush burn his cheeks although he didn’t know if it was visible in the dim lighting. There had never been anyone in Hux’s life who made him feel as cherished or loved, and his feelings for Ren deepened by the day. They had told one another of their love but a part of Hux had still been hesitant to let himself hope Ren would ever think of him in this way. And yet here was the proof. There was no fear or uncertainty in Hux’s heart, only joy.

 

“I accept,” he said.

 

His hand was shaking when Ren took the ring and slipped in onto Hux’s finger, but Ren’s hands were shaking too. Once Hux’s ring was on, Ren held out the other ring for Hux to slide onto Ren’s finger. When they were both in place Hux was certain that the heat was something caused by the ring itself and whatever energy it possessed. It hummed around his skin and Hux liked to think it was somehow bonding him and Ren together. They both knew the rings couldn’t be worn on their ring fingers at school but it didn’t matter to them during this important symbolic moment.

 

“Can’t we just leave now and not go back?” Hux whispered. He knew they couldn’t, that they had to endure just a little longer, but a part of him just wanted to stop listening to the rational side of his brain and give in to whimsy.

 

“I wish,” Ren chuckled before kissing Hux softly. “It’ll be soon though; only two more months. And Snoke wants me to buy the ship we’ll be using in the next week so I’m familiar with the controls.”

 

Hux leaned his head on Ren’s shoulders and took a deep breath in when he could smell Ren’s natural musk. This was really happening. Ren would get his ship and they would graduate and then Hux would say goodbye to this planet and his father forever with his hand entwined with Ren’s own. Ren would get trained in the ways of the Force and Hux would earn a position in the First Order due to his own merits, not because of his father trying to keep him on a leash.

 

Thinking all this made it easier to brush aside his dread at the thought of returning to the school grounds, and Hux felt calmer. “Should we head back?”

 

Ren looped a loose arm around Hux’s bare waist and pulled them both down into a horizontal position, holding Hux closer. “Let’s watch the stars for a while first.”

 

With no reason to argue, Hux turned his eyes to the sky.


	4. Chapter 4

Hux and Ren were seated in their stall in the refresher on the blanket they had spread across the floor. Both of them had textbooks open in their lap, studying for finals which were coming up in a month. The spring formal had come and gone and both Hux and Ren managed to sneak back into their dorms without raising suspicion after their trek into the forest. Hux wasn’t even the last one sneaking back in, many others enjoying rendezvous in little nooks they could find, and the teachers who likely suspected this didn’t make enquiries.

 

Ren had bought his ship as well as a storage spot in a local hangar on the far edge of town. They decided not to risk sneaking out together again but Ren told Hux every detail about the ship and the controls, as well as his growing confidence with handling it. The ship was a small family travel vessel, good for no more than four passengers and the necessary resources for a month-long trip, but it would suffice.

 

Snoke had provided Ren with the route coordinates to reach him once they both left the Academy, but they had been encrypted. Codes were one of Hux’s specialities and Ren left the decoding to him. Two weeks after the spring formal Ren had the ship stocked with the necessary supplies for the trip and Hux had the route mapped out and programmed into a chip he gave to Ren to insert into the ship’s systems. Now all they had to do was finish their exams, pack their things, and escape.

 

Since they couldn’t be seen with matching rings on their ring fingers, Hux put his on a chain which he wore under his school uniform at all times. He liked feeling the gold and the crystal pressed against his skin. Ren was a little bolder and wore his on his middle finger, though the ring was less of a statement without the visible pair on Hux’s own finger.

 

They had twenty minutes left before Hux’s free period ended and he had to leave. Both Hux and Ren were reading quietly, only sharing comments or questions back and forth occasionally, so it was easy to hear when the refresher door opened and slammed closed behind someone. Before either of them could say anything, Hux heard a very familiar voice call out loudly, “Armitage, are you in here?”

 

His father.

 

Hux’s wide eyes met Ren’s. Hux began to scramble to his feet but his father yanked the stall door open before Hux was fully standing. Immediately Brendol’s eyes narrowed and he grabbed Hux by the collar, pulling him forward and off balance so Hux stumbled out of the stall and against the nearest sink. Hux barely had time to acknowledge the sharp pain where his side impacted against the sink before Brendol grabbed him again and threw him to the ground.

 

“Filthy faggot! Who do you think you are to disgrace my name by sneaking away and doing unspeakable things with another man?” The words Hux’s father spat were not new to Hux’s ears but it was shocking to hear his father yell them where anyone could overhear. “Mark my words; I’ll get rewards for those three young men who informed me about this.”

 

Hux didn’t need to ask which three ‘young men’ had told his father. Hux’s only question was why Jacob, Anthony and Todd had waited as long as they had.  He didn’t bother asking the question though, too focused on pulling his knees to his chest in an attempt to protect his stomach where his father tried to kick him.

 

“Leave him alone!”

 

Brendol turned on his heel to regard Ren who was standing in the opening of the stall, hands curled into trembling fists at his sides. Brendol sneered. “Of course it would be you,” he spat. “You think you’re so smart, sneaking through this school’s system, but now you’ve gone too far. I can’t punish you for not attending class but I _can_ make you watch me put this pathetic vermin out of his misery before doing the same to you.”

 

Hux watched his father turn back to him and aim a kick at his head. But instead of feeling the sharp impact of a boot against his temple, Hux felt a burst of electricity and heat as he watched Brendol fly above his head and crumple against the far wall. It had all happened in slow motion. He had seen the way Ren’s eyes narrowed as he raised a hand a moment before Brendol was sent flying, and Hux could only assume Ren had harnessed the Force to protect him. Brendol still hadn’t moved since hitting the wall.

 

Ren’s face was pale and he was shaking when he knelt beside Hux and looked him over. “Are you alright?”

 

Hux blinked wide eyes at him. “Did you kill him?”

 

“I don’t know.” Ren’s face crumpled. “I just saw him about to kick you and I wanted to get him away from you as fast as possible. I’m sorry.”

 

“Ren, don’t apologize,” Hux reached up and caught Ren’s hand in his own. “I couldn’t give less of a shit about him, but you attacked the Commandant. Whether he’s dead or alive, you’re not safe. They’ll persecute you. Help me up.”

 

With careful hands Ren pulled Hux into a seated and then standing position. Hux could tell by the pain in his abdomen that he would have some bad bruising, but he would survive. He didn’t want to think about what condition he would’ve been in if Ren hadn’t intervened when he did. Together they walked over and Ren knelt down to press a finger against Brendol’s neck.

 

“He’s still alive,” Ren reported, looking back up at Hux. “What do we do now?”

 

Working through every possible scenario, Hux made a quick decision. “You have to leave the planet. As much as I don’t care about his wellbeing, any potential consequences will be less if he stays alive. I can get him to the medbay and say we were fighting and he slipped and hit his head.”

 

“Then why do I have to leave?” Ren stood again, looking angry now. “I’m not leaving you here to deal with the consequences alone when it’s my fault.”

 

“It’s not your fault,” Hux insisted, sticking firm to his decision. “My father attacked me; you protected me. But as soon as my father wakes up he’s going to spin them a story and they’ll be after you so you need to get to Snoke’s protection while you still can.”

 

“What about you?” Ren asked, voice cracking with emotion.

 

“He won’t kill me, Ren,” Hux reasoned. “Not when everyone is paying attention. I doubt he’ll even admit what the fight was about because he doesn’t want anyone to know about me – about us.”

 

“I don’t like this at all,” Ren admitted, wrapping Hux into a hug but jumping back when Hux whined with pain at the compression against his ribs. “At least let me heal you first.”

 

Hux pushed Ren’s hands away. “There’s no time. Plus my injuries need to fit the story.”

 

“Could you stop being so rational for two seconds?” Ren snapped. “Come with me. We’ll figure it out from there.”

 

Hux reached forward and kissed Ren softly, chastely. “I want to more than anything but I have to stay, and you have to go,” Hux said quietly. He hated it. The thought of being without Ren made Hux feel sick to his stomach. But this was the right call. “Just promise you’ll come back for me.”

 

“Of course!” Ren said and kissed Hux roughly. “I’ll always come back for you.”

 

“You better,” Hux huffed and then pulled away, feeling his resolve crumbling. “Now get yourself to safety, _please_.”

 

Ren hesitated, looking like he was going to continue arguing. But then they heard voices and footsteps down the hall outside and they both knew their moment was over. With one last lingering look Ren told Hux “I love you” and “I’ll come back” and then he was slipping out of the window they had used weeks ago during the spring formal.

 

Hux was left alone to take a few deep breaths and compose himself. Then he forced himself out of the refresher and into the hallway to get help for the last man in the world Hux wanted to save.

 

#

 

Hux tried not to wince when he lifted his hands to knot his tie and pull on his jacket for his graduation uniform. There were no marks visible on his skin but that hadn’t stopped Brendol from releasing his wrath on Hux’s skin that would be covered by his uniform. Hux’s skin had been bruised since Brendol had been released from the medbay a week after the fight with a cane to keep him off his healing ankle.

 

A cane that Hux’s father used liberally and with great satisfaction.

 

Every joint in Hux’s body was stiff and sore, but what ached most insistently was Hux’s heart. He had never considered himself to be a whimsical romantic, prone to daydreaming and pining. And yet since Ren had gone Hux had done little else. Ren had been his lifeline and now Hux had to deal with the abuse of his father and the bullies who Brendol had empowered without any safe space or a caring embrace to tell him this would all pass.

 

It didn’t help that on top of Ren’s physical absence, Hux hadn’t received any correspondence from him either. It was impossible for Hux to not wonder if, when Ren had escaped the planet, Ren had decided it was a lot easier to just move forward and not look back. Why risk returning to Arkanis where the Commandant of the Academy would demand him killed for Hux, who really wasn’t all that special or worth the trouble?

 

Maybe Hux would never see Ren again, and he didn’t know what he would do if that ended up being the case. For now Hux forced himself to struggle through each day and believe that Ren would keep his promise to come back. And in bed at night when Hux was alone and briefly safe, he would clutch at the ring under his shirt and hope Ren could somehow feel it wherever he was.

 

“What’s taking so long?” Brendol banged the end of his cane against the closed door of Hux’s bedroom, making Hux jump. Since his father had been released from the medbay, Brendol had had Hux approved to spend the nights at home rather than in the dorms. Brendol argued it was because he needed his son’s help while he was recovering but Hux knew it was nothing more than a ploy to keep Hux within reach whenever Brendol felt energetic enough to dish out some more punishment.

 

“Nothing, I’m ready,” Hux called out in the hopes that his father wouldn’t come in.

 

“About damn time,” Brendol snapped. “I’ll be in the vehicle… worthless piece of…” Hux heard the words fading as his father walked away and Hux rolled his eyes.

 

He checked his tie and brushed out any wrinkles he could find. After that he pulled on the greatcoat he was ordered to wear and then walked out of the room. They had to get there early since Brendol would be on stage for the ceremony. He would give a speech and then give an award to the student who graduated top of their class – in this case, Hux himself – and then he would sit to get off his ankle and let others handle the rest of the proceedings.

 

Hux sat in the back seat of the vehicle next to his father and the driver got into the front seat, a privacy screen between them. “I can’t believe I have to give a filthy disgrace like _you_ the medal of achievement,” Brendol grumbled, sending his son a sideways glare.

 

Hux remained facing forward, face devoid of emotion. He had gotten good at keeping his expression blank the last month. “Perhaps you should give it to whoever you want and I can explain to everyone why you were so adverse to me having it.”

 

“Don’t start with me!” Brendol’s fingers gripped the head of his cane tightly but he didn’t raise it. “Trust me boy, after you graduate I’m going to get you assigned to the shittiest post on the shittiest planet I can find.”

 

Hux said nothing and instead gazed out the window for the rest of the short ride. When they arrived on the Academy grounds Hux followed two steps behind his father to the stage that had been set out on the lawn. The school administration had decided to take advantage of the warm sunny day while the good weather lasted. Hux could see the chairs that had been set up on the lawn for the parents already milling in, and the large space between the chairs where the graduating students would stand at parade rest.

 

Time passed slowly after Hux helped his father onto the stage where he took his seat. Hux was thankful when he got sent away so he didn’t have to linger at his father’s elbow. He couldn’t go far though; not only did he have to stay close for when the ceremony began, but Hux was in too much pain to enjoy a walk across the grounds anyway. So he stood where he had been told to wait at the front of where the rest of the students would line up, ready to accept his award and diploma.

 

After that… Hux didn’t know. He hadn’t let himself think on it too hard. Hux didn’t doubt his father’s resolve to get him placed on a shitty planet after he graduated, but what was he going to do about it? Hux could run away, but then his degree and military standing would be shot. Regardless, whether he left the planet on his own or under his father’s order, Hux would be somewhere new and at that point the hope that Ren would find and come for him seemed foolish.

 

“If everyone could please take their seats…”

 

Hux looked around and realized he had zoned out, which wasn’t typical of him normally but had become increasingly common over the last month. All of the parents were sitting down and music was beginning to play for the rest of the graduates to march out and stand behind Hux in their pre-organized ranks. Hux squared his shoulders and prayed this would all be over soon.

 

Once the anthem and opening address was complete, Hux was called on stage to be presented with his award for graduating with the top marks in his year. Hux kept himself from flinching away when Brendol reached for him and pinned the award to his coat, and also avoided rolling his eyes when listening to his father’s lacklustre congratulations.

 

Hux stood aside after accepting his award and diploma and watched through glassy eyes as the rest of his class got their own diplomas. There were a few people he had chatted with over his years at the Academy but most of the people he barely knew and certainly couldn’t call friends. It was hard to watch Anthony, Todd and Jacob walk on stage and shake Brendol’s hand, looking proud, knowing Brendol preferred them much more than he would ever approve of Hux.

 

The minutes passed by and Hux felt increasingly overwhelmed with despair. It was like there were hands around his neck, choking him. This is what he had worked towards his whole life in the hope that graduating would free him from his father and get him a new start. Then he had met Ren and realized there was even more worth fighting for; that Hux was capable of not just success but also love and happiness too.

 

Now Ren was gone. He wasn’t coming back. And Hux was going to remain under Brendol’s thumb until one of them died. It all seemed so hopeless, and Hux wondered if there was even a point in continuing on beyond today. Idly Hux considered the small pistol he had hidden under his greatcoat and kept with him at all times these days in case his father tried to do too much damage.

 

“And that concludes our ceremony today,” the Academy’s president wrapped up his speech. “If you would all like to join us inside there are refreshments available.”

 

Students and parents started to file out and walk towards the school, chatting and laughing on their way. Hux remained where he was in parade rest, waiting for his father to finish shaking hands with the rest of the Academy administration and then decide if he wanted to go inside or head home. Hux let his mind wander again, assuming everyone else had left and wouldn’t bother him, but was mistaken when he got shoved hard from behind.

 

Hux wasn’t able to contain his gasp of pain when his body twisted to stop himself from falling to the ground. The injuries across his covered skin screamed at him and Hux felt his temper flare when he turned and saw his three tormenters standing in a row, looking smug. “What’s the matter, Hux? We thought you liked being on your knees.”

 

With a quick glance to the stage, Hux noted that all of the administration had started to walk away towards the school. A few looked back but Brendol was the one to wave them off and insist he would handle things, and that he would catch up with them. Three bullies and his father: not exactly an even fight.

 

But before Hux could even respond, he heard the whine of an approaching shuttle and had to brace himself against the wind buffering from the engines as it landed a short distance away. His bullies and Brendol paused and braced themselves as well, everyone confused by the Upsilon-class command shuttle being landed in restricted airspace.

 

When the shuttle powered down and the ramp lowered, at first Hux wasn’t sure what he was seeing. All he saw was a tall, broad-shouldered form dressed almost entirely in black armour running towards him. But as the individual got closer Hux recognized Ren’s long black hair and dark, angry eyes which were focused directly on Brendol. It was all Hux needed to see to remember himself and that there _was_ something worth fighting for. He withdrew his pistol from the holster under his coat and before Anthony, Jacob and Todd even clued in or did more than shout, Hux had a shot burned through each of their skulls.

 

The three bodies slumped to the grass, lifeless and with their blood pooling around Brendol’s boots. Brendol, to his credit, looked angry rather than scared as he pulled his own pistol on Hux and pulled the trigger before Hux could react. Hux braced for impact and a quick death but the hit never came. Hux opened his eyes and saw the bolt frozen in the air a foot in front of his face, pulsing and twitching but not moving. A second later Ren was at Hux’s side, hand raised and focused on holding the bolt at bay with the Force.

 

Brendol sneered and fired off the remaining rounds in his pistol until it needed to be recharged. Hux heard Ren grunt with exertion but he held off all eight bolts, the air pulsing with static energy that prickled Hux’s skin. Then Brendol threw his useless gun to the ground and spat, glaring at Hux. “Kill me, I dare you,” he taunted Hux, lips twisted into a cruel smile. “You’re a fuckup and you’ll never get anywhere without me.”

 

Hux looked from Brendol to Ren, who glanced back at him. Ren was clearly straining under the power required to hold off all eight shots but his eyes were worried and caring and warm. Hux turned back to his father and shook his head. “I’m not going to kill you, you miserable piece of shit. But only to leave you to suffer when you hear all I’ll accomplish without you,” Hux stated, “because I don’t need you, or an army. I just need Ren, and my own resolve.”

 

Taking this as a sign, Ren sent the bolts veering off in different directions, a few fizzling out in the sky and others scorching the grass on either side of him and Hux. Then Ren wrapped an arm around Hux’s waist and reeled him in for a brief kiss. “I’m sorry I was gone for so long,” Ren apologized quietly.

 

“Disgraceful, unnatural filth!” Brendol shouted at them both.

 

With controlled rage Hux raised his gun and shot his father in the knee, watching the man cry out with pain and crumple to the grass. “Something to remember me by,” he said and then holstered his pistol, looking back at Ren. “Can we go now?”

 

“You’re hot when you’re angry, you know that?” Ren laughed and took Hux’s hand, walking them both back towards his shuttle.

 

Hux was exhausted but he still gave a little chuckle and squeezed Ren’s hand. “You don’t look bad yourself right now.”

 

In fact, in that moment Hux wasn’t sure he had seen a sight more beautiful than Ren. Not even because Ren looked as attractive as he had the first day Hux saw him. But because seeing Ren and having him here meant that the last month of physical torture from his father, and mental torture from his own fears about the future, had been worth it. The sense of relief welling up inside Hux was almost overwhelming.

 

Perhaps everything Hux was feeling was visible in his eyes because Ren’s smile softened and they shared another kiss. “Let’s get out of here,” Ren said at last, and Hux happily followed.

 

In the shuttle Hux sat in the co-pilot seat next to Ren who quickly powered the ship on and launched them into outer orbit. Hux didn’t get long to gaze down at the planet he had been confined to for so many years before Ren approved the coordinates for their return trip and Hux didn’t feel an ounce of remorse when Arkanis disappeared from view.

 

Once the shuttle was on autopilot, Ren got out of his seat and approached Hux. He looked hungry, and Hux would admit to desiring a physical reunion as well, but he couldn’t stop his groan of pain when Ren tried to pull him into his arms. Ren pulled away as though burned, eyes wide and worried. “Did I do something wrong?”

 

Hux hesitated, not wanting to worry Ren more, but knew Ren would find out eventually either way. “I just have a lot of bruises right now.”

 

Ren’s eyes narrowed and he pursed his lips. “Come on, let me look you over.”

 

Hux was led to a small bedroom barely large enough to fit the double bed and a bedside table for storage. Standing beside the bed Hux hesitated again, feeling nervous and self-conscious even though rationally he knew Ren coming back for him indicated that Ren hadn’t changed his mind about them. As if reading his mind, Ren stepped into Hux’s personal space and embraced him gently. “I missed you every day.”

 

Hux found some loose fabric around Ren’s neck and upper torso which he clutched at with his fingers. “I missed you too,” he admitted. “I worried—”

 

“I promised I’d come back,” Ren reminded him.

 

“I know,” Hux sighed. “But things were so awful I was scared to hope… But you’re here now,” he retold himself aloud and Ren smiled and kissed him.

 

After that Hux relaxed enough to start undoing his layers of clothing. Ren was eager to assist and before long Hux’s tie, coat, belt and shoes were scattered on the floor. When Hux undid the buttons of his shirt and Ren got his first sight of the bruises, Ren muttered a string of curses and a few thoughts of what he’d do to Brendol if they ever met again. But then Ren’s hands were back on Hux’s skin, holding him carefully as they removed the rest of Hux’s clothes and got him on the bed. Ren quickly took off his outer layers as well until he was dressed in nothing but a loose pair of pants, and then he sat on the bed by Hux’s hip.

 

Hux could see the dismay in Ren’s expression as he took in the extent of the damage littered across Hux’s bruise-mottled skin. “I shouldn’t have left,” Ren whispered brokenly, fingers barely daring to brush the bruises around Hux’s ribs.

 

“You’re here now,” Hux repeated. “And it was necessary at the time.” Ren frowned, likely at the implication that Hux’s abuse and Ren’s absence was necessary. Hux didn’t want a fight though; he just wanted to rest and recover and reconnect with Ren. “I’ll be okay, Ren,” he promised.

 

Ren nodded and touched his fingers to the ring still on the chain around Hux’s neck. Hux noticed that Ren’s own ring was back on his ring finger, which made him smile. “Let me heal as much as I can,” Ren offered and Hux gave his consent. Hux was accustomed to the sensation of Ren’s healing abilities and he quickly relaxed under Ren’s touch. Hux hadn’t realized how tired he was until he could lie down and close his eyes and feel _safe_. “Don’t fall asleep on me,” Ren nudged his arm. “We still need to have reunion sex.”

 

Hux chuckled and forced his eyes open; he hadn’t noticed that he was starting to drift to sleep. “You have high hopes.”

 

“You don’t seem opposed to the idea.” To prove his point, Ren brushed his fingers over Hux’s cock, which was definitely more than half hard from having Ren’s hands on his body.

 

Hux wasn’t going to deny his interest, even though he was tired. “Do you have lube?” Ren nodded and pulled away just long enough to grab a container of lube from the bedside table. Hux raised an eyebrow. “Eager, were we?” Ren paused, suddenly looking uncertain, and Hux rolled his eyes and held out a hand to beckon Ren closer. “I’m just teasing. I’ve been waiting for this too.”

 

Ren returned to the bed, set aside the lube, and kissed Hux hard enough to make him moan. Hux kissed back, feeling his tiredness fade away as his mind and body was sparked to life by arousal. Hux whined in displeasure when Ren moved away a minute later, insisting on healing all of Hux’s bruises before anything else. He could see Ren’s erection tenting his pants so Hux knew there was no lack of interest to worry about. And although Hux felt a bit impatient now that his body was riled up, he was also relieved at feeling his body heal from its continued pain and stiffness.

 

Thankfully it didn’t take much longer since Brendol hadn’t hit Hux’s legs nearly as much as his chest, back and abdomen. As soon as Ren was finished he yanked his pants off and plastered his body against Hux’s own, kissing him feverishly. Hux let his hands roam, caressing and groping anywhere he touched. Ren was rutting against him and the friction after a month apart was enough that Hux was certain they could both finish like this. But then Ren moaned in Hux’s ear, “I want you inside me.”

 

Immediately Hux grabbed the lube and slicked up his first two fingers. While he did that Ren changed positions, knees by Hux’s shoulders and mouth over Hux’s crotch. Hux was still rubbing the lube between his fingers to warm it up when Ren leaned down and took Hux into his mouth and Hux’s breathing stuttered. Ren used his hands to pin Hux’s hips when they rose automatically and then relaxed his jaw, swallowing Hux deeper to the back of his throat.

 

“Kriff,” Hux groaned and then forced himself to focus. Admittedly impatient, Hux pressed both fingers against Ren’s hole to see if he could take two or needed to start with one. There was a moment of resistance and then Hux’s fingers started to sink into Ren’s body, lube easing the way. Ren moaned around Hux’s cock and rutted back on Hux’s fingers, forcing them in deeper. “Ren don’t—hurt yourself,” Hux chided, though any warning edge was lost in his breathlessness.

 

Ren moaned again and started stroking his tongue against Hux’s length. Hux continued to push his fingers in deeper as Ren’s body stretched around the intrusion. When his fingers were in to the knuckles Hux carefully scissored them apart, working Ren open for the girth of his cock. As Ren sucked Hux harder, Hux fucked Ren on his fingers more harshly, squirming under the weight of Ren’s body as pleasure consumed him.

 

Ren moved away before Hux got three fingers in him and Hux was too eager to argue. Hux grabbed more lube to coat his length, stroking himself a few times to take the edge off as he watched Ren face him and kneel above his hips. Ren reached down to grip Hux, who let go and watched the beautiful sight of Ren lining himself up and sinking down on Hux’s cock.

 

It felt unbelievably good to be inside Ren again. Not only was he as hot as ever but his ass was slightly tighter than usual due to their month apart. Hux could feel every inch of his length getting taken in and squeezed and he nearly lost it right there. “You feel so good, Ren,” Hux muttered, brushing his fingers along Ren’s trembling thighs.

 

“So do you,” Ren said after sitting down fully on Hux’s cock, full and stretched to the limit.

 

Without anything else said, Ren began to rock in Hux’s lap. Hux gripped Ren’s hips to support and also lead him, pulling Ren off his cock and then pushing him back down to meet each of Hux’s upward thrusts. The bed squeaked its protests but there was no one else to hear, and Hux and Ren were far beyond stopping. Above the noise of the bed were the sounds of panting and wet flesh slapping together. They were both too desperate to pace themselves and instead started fucking hard and fast, racing the other towards completion.

 

Watching himself disappear inside Ren’s body over and over had Hux thrusting harder each time, and he noticed Ren’s bobbing cock beginning to dribble precome on his stomach. Hux reached forward and started to stroke Ren tightly, milking more precome from the head which he smeared over his fingers. Ren cried out at the sensation and started to lose his rhythm, eyes clenched closed and lips parted. Hux wasn’t sure he had seen something more beautiful.

 

Hux’s only warning that Ren was getting close was the little gasps sneaking in between his inhales and the tightening of his body around Hux’s cock. Eager to see and feel Ren finish around him, Hux adjusted the angle of his thrusts until he found Ren’s prostate, causing the taller man to throw his head back and cry out. “That’s not fair,” Ren protested when he recovered. “I don’t want it to end.”

 

Hux mimicked the angle he had found and thrust up against Ren’s prostate again. He smirked when Ren tensed and groaned. “I’ll fuck you again later.”

 

Ren pushed his hair out of his face distractedly and met Hux’s heated gaze. “That better be a promise.”

 

“It is,” Hux assured him. “Right now…” Hux thrust into Ren again and stroked him at the same time, “I want you to let go and finish with my cock in your ass.”

 

“Well when you say it like that,” Ren laughed and then groaned when he started bouncing on Hux’s cock again. Hux made sure to angle towards Ren’s prostate as often as he could and matched the pace of his hand on Ren’s cock with each of his thrusts.

 

Less than a minute later Ren’s rhythm turned frenzied and then he tensed fully in Hux’s lap, moaning loud and long as he came across Hux’s stomach. The feeling of Ren’s body squeezing him repeatedly was enough to drag Hux over the edge as well and he spilled his seed in Ren’s ass, burying it deeper with a few shallow thrusts.

 

When they were both spent Ren lifted himself off Hux with shaking limbs and grabbed a cloth from the refresher attached to the bedroom. They cleaned themselves and then curled up under the blankets together. Ren was kissing him and Hux kissed back, but lethargy was tugging at him and Hux couldn’t stop his yawn. Ren kissed him again afterwards, but briefly, and then curled up against Hux’s side with an arm flung over Hux’s stomach.

 

“I’m never letting us be separated ever again,” Ren mumbled against Hux’s neck.

 

Realistically Hux knew that if Ren was being trained in the ways of the Force and Hux was going to work on his military career progression in the First Order, there would have to be times where he and Ren would be apart. Between training and missions they would have no choice. “Just make sure we get stationed in the same place,” Hux suggested. It would be easier for them to be apart if they knew they would see one another again upon their return from a mission.

 

“Already in the works,” Ren said, sounding proud. “I told Snoke I wouldn’t be his apprentice without you, and Snoke assured me he already had plans for us to work together. He said something about a weapon you were designing?”

 

Hux tensed with surprise. “He’s seen my blueprints for Starkiller?”

 

Ren shrugged, in danger of succumbing to sleep. “I think your professor passed it along to Snoke after you submitted it for final grading. Relax; he sounded impressed.”

 

Hux did relax, and he smiled. The designs for Starkiller were ambitious but Hux had gone over every single detail to ensure it was viable. Hux considered it his greatest work to date, and knowing the leader of the First Order was not only aware but interested in his work reassured Hux that he truly would be able to earn a place in the Order on his own merits. Hux hadn’t been lying when he spoke to his father for the last time. Hux didn’t need his father; only himself and Ren.

 

“You’ll have to tell me everything that happened since you left,” Hux told Ren, wanting to hear every detail about Snoke and Ren’s training. After seeing Ren stop those eight pistol shots in midair it was clear to Hux that Ren had true potential and was learning fast.

 

Ren mumbled something nonsensical and Hux realized he was more asleep than awake. Knowing sleep would do him good as well, Hux held Ren a little closer and let his eyes drift closed as he took deep breaths in and out. There were a lot of challenges and opportunities in his future, and Hux knew it wouldn’t be easy. But with Ren by his side, Hux knew they could accomplish anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, and to those who have taken the time to leave a comment <3 I really appreciate your excitement and encouragement as I get back into the writing rhythm ^.^ I'm aiming to get more Kylux written and posted ASAP!

**Author's Note:**

> [My Tumblr](http://onewhositswiththeturtles.tumblr.com/)


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